Okay, so, in my humble opinion, Turkish Delight is pretty fucking disgusting, and maybe I’ve never tried any good Turkish Delight. But why in the hell did Edmund feel the need to betray his family for it? I know it was wartime but jeez, boy.
So, I ate all of my Starbursts, which is sad. Now, all that remains are the imaginary candies they try to make you eat but aren’t real. Like my mom always told me, “Never eat yellow Starbursts.” It’s a better idea to give them to your enemies to choke on.
To whom it may concern at Jell-O,
Throughout my life and childhood, my mother and I have been avid consumers of your products, but I have always been particularly partial to your pudding cups . However, today, I drove my mom to the grocery store, and upon seeing pudding on the refrigerator shelves, suggested the purchase of said food to enjoy as a lovely summer treat. To my dismay, upon reaching for the product, I discovered that each standard package of pudding cups now only contains FOUR individual servings, instead of the customary SIX. The price for 2/3 of the pudding remained the same as the original grouping. I would understand a raising of price, what with inflation and the economy, but your choice to limit the amount of product that may be purchased in each package is BLASPHEMOUS, in my eyes. I find the loss of two pudding cups to be a tremendous outrage. We returned from the store three hours ago, and only one pudding cup remains, despite consuming just one myself. This number is more than disheartening. I cannot express my anger and disappointment in the package of four pudding cups in mere words. You should be ashamed of yourselves, short-changing families and young children across the nation from a wonderful custard dessert.
An Upset Lover of Tapioca Pudding
Alley and I went to the vet, today. On the last day of my car’s long life, she plastered the velour seats with her nervous shedding.
Yes, this picture of my cat was entirely necessary.
Butter was on sale at the grocery store, so my mom came home with 25 pounds of it.
We have to do this stupid project in history making a cereal box for an American Hero, so, of course, I chose Andrew Jackson, and a disgusting number of puns were to follow.
Does anyone else find it hilarious that the tumblr spotlight has a section for parenting?